The Wrath of Achilles and Hector's end.

Sing oh Muse. 
Tell of the Wrath of Achilles,
Proper teddy out of the pram stuff,
To see his best mate Patroclitorus 
Bullied by weedy Paris,
And his unfair bow stats...

From blind Humour's Unfinished epic, Achilles and the Mystery of the Trojan Hearse.

As in quarters we lay, as you swiftly shall hear,
Agamemnon came to us and bid us prepare,
He said mount on your chariots and forwards I say,
For the Trojans have definately come out to play

Well they line themselves up and the play it began
Thinking to disdain we brave geeky men.
(Sorry Greeky...)

But at them and on them
With brave Achilles we flew

Yet the Geek army was losing at first

The game changed as our dice luck rose...

To chants of die Hector, die Hector, even fat Agamemnon loses his cool.

The death of Hector.

The Greeks rage forwards

The fighting is not one sided but the death of Trojan heroes continues.

And both Achilles and Agamemnon break through the Trojan centre.

Whilst the right flank sees more carnage.

Beneath the wall of the city many Trojans lay dead
Many were taken, the rest of them fled
Their generals likewise we took from the field
It was the mighty Geek army that caused the Trojans to yield!

Many Trojans were injured in the course of this game, and it's a fitting end to our Bronze Age Campaign.  A mighty victory, yet we failed to take the walls, and as for Hector's body, although it was claimed by Agamemnon, the god Haphaestus, in the form of a wizened angry bewhiskered hairy fellow, snatched it to deny the prize.

Apologies to the 15th Hussars!

The Battle before the Hittite Walls.

From the Goniad

Stanza 23456

"Sing oh Muse
Tell of the big lad and
His mighty weapon etc...
How the Hittites held their Walls
And a disappointing minor victory"

The Sea People parade the stolen god up and down the line.  This infuriates the Hittites who come out to offer battle.

The lines are drawn up.

And Phallus Champion of the Peleset goes a little mad and challenges the Hittites to single combat.

So much for that idea.

The Hittites are enraged, and attack surging forward.

Unhappy with my deployment I make some turns to get a better advance.

That area of rough ground to the front is a pain.

And the Pajamarama - Wilma combo of heroes launches chariot attacks on the right.

Better picture!

I spread my forces to give me some pushback room. And I drive the Hittites back from the rough ground to reorganise.

Those Hittites come forward aggressively on the right, with excellent dice luck.

And I charge chariots into a gap through skirmishers to exploit and waste the Hittites mighty deeds.

And Pajamarama is getting shoved back on the right.

The Hittites confront my exposed hero, Patroclitorus, with a higher level hero charge.

And Pajamarama is in bother

With his chariots killed Patroclitorus has had it!

And the Hittites are massing against my left.  Holding them though.

The big guy goes in killing off a Hittites foot warriors group.

But I lose Arsius, bold fellow, pushed his luck.

The Hittites general and is in trouble, but it's the last turn.

The endgame.  The Hittites have more far tokens than the Sea Peoples.  We win the campaign with a narrow victory, but fail before the mighty walls.

Great game!

The Theft of the Hittite god

The victory of Gonad of Gath and his ally Pajamarama, from the Anatolian hell hole that is Marmaris, has meant a chance to steal the Hittite god.  It's a disgusting yet rather sexy statue that we intend to oil up and perform unholy rites upon.  Gonad has offered to be in charge of that onerous task!

We have six turns to get into contact with the temple.  Is that possible?

The Hittite god.  With the claw of Vectron, proving He Shows Favour.

And the temple in the hills

The Hittites have only a small garrison but more are coming to assist.

The Peleset race forward using all of our mighty deeds just to keep going 

And Mighty Gonad, nine cubits tall gets (the second) charge.

We press closer but it's costly.

The big boy kills the group blocking him, but his own men are spent.

And the fight continues as The Giant Peleset King wallops another of their warrior bands

They put up a stiff resistance.  The Peleset use their chariots as bait.

But the chariots win.  I'm astounded.

Pajamarama and Wilma do their very best to get themselves killed.

Frankly the fight to keep Pajamarama's boys back was absolutely heroic.  The enemy lost three generals.  ( It may have been four!)

And the King of Gath rolls a mighty 11 hits in one round.  Blow that trumpet boy!

Arsius, my heroic long suffering number two hero charges in the chariots again.  Crazy guy!

But by turn five the jig is very much up.

The Giant King is within a whisper.  He can't be stopped.

And Arsius wins again.  The chariots rush through.

And it's three up as we take the god.  He/she/it is in for quite a night!

Next time

The walls of the city of the Hittites.

Sing, oh muse

Tell of the Great King

A man of Great length

And very tall too.

He smote the Hittites

Took their stone god

And got very amorous.

Ding, dong!