The Fat Tanker's second game

What Ho chaps,
Bumfluff here, 2nd Lt "Bumfluff " Farthingdale  2RTR. This week we were at Gazala, and Benghasi, shocking sanitation.

My tank is still not running properly, colleagues in the Regiment have pointed out that this is probably due to my weight.

Benghazi, Jewel of the Med... what a dump

The allied plan, go right wing!  What could possibly go wrong!  Bumfluff's tank once again refuses to start...

Is that a panzer up that alley?

 As Lt. Elworth Beest and Sergeant Dundas motor past him Bumfluff's engine stalls.  he declares that he is kicking his driver... 

Its cat and mouse round two... Benghasi

The Axis mass on the right

Bumfluff hides, and fights a duel to his front

The A9s of the Allies swing out wide onto the right dealing out some punishment...

"Ace" Rimmer appears, having motored across the table

Why is it that tactics seem to be to snuggle up

Bumfluff backs up, protecting his shiny metal ass

The bird's eye view, as Bumfluff backs up again.  Careful of his arse that boy!

"Ace Rimmer" motors around to try to take Bumfluff up the rear, but its too late. Phase One is over, Win for the Allies in phase 1

Phase two, still in Benghasi, still a dump

Phase two, Cesare Pavarotti puts his tank into a trap

As the British tanks swarm

Three to one, and one of those three is a Valentine.  Still the laugh is on them when they try to get Cesare out of his turret hatch  The Axis win the second phase!

Three Leeks on our shirts...

Yaki dar boyos, Dai the Drag-on here.  Prince of Pontins-Prestatyn, Welsh isn't it, in a sequined frock gambeson!  

Had some visitors round our way we have.  Scots and the Frenchies it was.  Come for a lovely punch up see.

24 points of Lion Rampant.  The list was one unit of Mounted Sergeants (that's me see) three foot yeomen with javelins and two archers.

The battlefield was near my Uncle Emrys place at Llanfairpwllgwyngyll.  Staunch member of the LBGT resistance to the English Emrys, isn't it boyo?

Uncle Emrys place at Llanfairpwllgwyngyll

The army of the Drag-on gets on table.

Look you, its the Scotchmen isnt it!  

Oh and the Frenchies too.  Whatever Emrys has in those cow sheds they wants it boyo...

The Drag-on in trouble.  Those French are dressed in solid iron boyo.  Prince Dai dies...

The Scotch creeping around the hedgerows

The thing to do in Wales is to crawl through the woods apparently

And on those Frenchies come

Now the Welsh have heard of the Golden Spurs at Courtrai, and have adopted their tactics against these French...  Box yourself into a defensive position...

And they're off, its Guy in white leading from Guy in brown, and they take the jump...

But half of the French wander off to have a go at the Scotchmen...

And its the Scots who have a go at the Welsh position.  Not that successful...

So its bows, followed by javelins.  The Welsh have a good tactical position

French Guy leaps into the position, claiming that he is now the Wolf in the sheep fold.  These are Welshmen boyo!  Sheep is one thing they know all about!  The Frenchman is killed...

The Scotchmen have a mad moment and charge over the bridge.  Its it just me or ...

Its a scrap as the Scots throw back their hated enemy, the French crossbowmen

Meanwhile the Gui the Wolf is unceremoniously thrown out of the Welsh sheep fold, before being stabbed up the buttocks by a javelin.

The Scotch commander is over bold and rolls snake eyes...  

But the Scots charge has ripped the heart out of the French advance

Game over.  The Welsh cling on, as do the Scots but there is no denying the Victory of the French.

The memorial to Dai the Drag-on Prince of Pontins-Prestatyn, cross dresser and gay pride of the valleys, can be found near Emrys house, Llanfairpwllgwyngyll.

The Fat Tanker, War Comics Issue 1

The Fat Tanker, War Comic Issue 1#

What ho chaps!
2nd Lt Bumfluff Farthingdale, 2RTR here...  I`ve been a rear echelon type for the first few months of this war.  Off making up the garrison of Cyprus if you please.  Very nice it was too, but the  war has caught up with me and I`m posted up the Blue!

I arrived in time for Tobruk.  The regiment was sporting a few different types of tanks, but they all seemed to have one thing in common for a fellow of my girth... a narrow hatchway! 

Now I`ve taken a bit of ribbing for the few extra pounds a chap carries, but it seems to me that I`ve found a way forward.  The gunner has been trained to haul on my legs until I squeeze through into the turret.  The key to modern warfare is to conduct it all from a nice comfy seat in a tank turret, none of that marching around inflicted on the Infantry. 

Here then is the tale of my first battle up the Blue, a battle which I survived more or less intact
  

The Battle for Tobruk...

A view of Tobruk

Ceasare Pavarotti charges towards the Triumphal Arch

The Axis plan, to split around the town and attack on the flanks

The Allied plan looked something similar

The Italians pick on a straggler.

A lot of sneaking about and around the buildings

Some fast tanks running around in this game

Ceasare still dueling around that archway

The Allies just have more numbers and swamp the left flank

A kill for the Allies

Round and round.  For a novice Pavarotti holds his own... Well he had read the rules, which is a bonus

Phase two of the battle begins. 

 

Bumfluff squeezes into his turret

Bumfluff advances, the engine straining to carry the weight

The Allied plan, to get among the outer edge of the buildings before being swamped.

Finally Bumfluff gets that tank into cover.  Is the engine burning oil do we think?

The Allies make it into town, but the Axis have some fast moving tanks.

More of that ring around going on...

The Vultures begin to circle

But the main duel of the game is a ding dong gun to gun fight at a range of one inch!

Slowly the duel separates as they blow each other backwards

And in the town centre more of that circling...  pretty much until game over...

The standings - Allied

The standings - Axis